


without you I'm just cold

by emilia_kaisa



Series: safe in your arms [2]
Category: Figure Skating RPF
Genre: Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Boys In Love, Established Relationship, Explicit Sexual Content, Fluff, Light Dom/sub, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Outdoor Sex, Smut, Vacation, mostly top!Yuzu because this is how I roll
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-25
Updated: 2020-03-25
Packaged: 2021-01-02 22:36:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,037
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21168992
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emilia_kaisa/pseuds/emilia_kaisa
Summary: Javi fulfilled his promise made a year before, and now they were there, deep in the Spanish countryside. They were staying in a cabin that belonged to one of Javi's friends, and so far, Yuzuru didn’t have any objections. It was a nice place, far from other building, and there was a small pool in a backyard. A perfect place for a romantic getaway, and Yuzuru had every intention to make a use of it.aka Spanish Shamefest





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> The season is getting intense, so it seems like a perfect time for some smut, don't you think?  
Have a look at the tags, and if you're uncomfortable with any of them, please reconsider reading. This is obviously fiction, and biggest thanks to my wonderful beta K1mHeechu1 for helping me out ❤️ So, buckle up, here we go, I hope you enjoy!  
(The title taken from 'Cold' by James Blunt)

Yuzuru looked around the cabin, humming approvingly before turning to look at Javi. 

“I like it.” he announced and Javi grinned widely, his eyes sparkling.

“Yeah? Then I’m happy.”

Yuzuru smiled back and slowly walked closer to Javi, making sure to make his moves extra sensual.

“You made a real effort.” he whispered against Javi’s mouth, nipping on his lower lip "Thank you." 

"Well I promised you nice Spanish vacation, didn't I?" 

"Yes, you did." 

Javi fulfilled his promise made a year before, and now they were there, deep in the Spanish countryside. They were staying in a cabin that belonged to one of Javi's friends, and so far, Yuzuru didn’t have any objections. It was a nice place, far from other building, and there was a small pool in a backyard. A perfect place for a romantic getaway, and Yuzuru had every intention to make a use of it. 

“Are you hungry?” he asked lowly and Javi snorted, wrapping one arm around Yuzuru’s waist.

“Not for food.”

“Great. Then go and clean yourself nicely. And please, shave.” he said with a smug grin “I have big plans for you.”

Javi’s eyes sparkled with excitement and he slowly detached himself from Yuzuru, taking a step back and giving him a teasing smile before disappearing in the bathroom.

Yuzuru smiled to himself before walking to the kitchen where he poured himself a glass of water. He wasn’t tired, or jet- lagged, because they had spent the last three days in Madrid, catching up with Javi’s family. Yuzuru enjoyed that, so much, but he liked it so much more when they could be together, alone, far away from everyone they knew and didn’t know. 

Yuzuru’s smile turned sly as he thought about the upcoming weekend, the time he would share only with Javi. He had been craving that for so long, hunger burning inside him since the last time they had met, two months before. 

He didn’t want to wait anymore. 

He got rid of his shirt as he walked to the bathroom, feeling excitement circling in his veins. It had been too long, and he didn’t feel like he could wait anytime longer. He pushed the bathroom door open, and the first thing he saw was Javi, completely naked, drying his face with a towel. 

“You couldn’t wait, huh.” Javi smiled, meeting Yuzuru’s gaze in the mirror, smiling teasingly. He put the towel away, but didn’t turn around; instead, he leaned over the sink a little bit, presenting himself, and Yuzuru felt a jolt or arousal.

“You’re such a freaking, tease, Javi.” 

He closed the distance between them and grabbed Javi’s shoulder, turning him around and kissing him, brief and chaste and not enough.

"Turn around. Hands on the sink." Yuzuru instructed, smiling smugly at Javi's loud gasp "Come on, don't make me wait." 

Javi blinked rapidly before doing as he was told and Yuzuru nodded with approval. 

"Very good." he said, taking a step closer and putting his hand on Javi's waist, rubbing gently. He looked over Javi's shoulder and their eyes met in a mirror, dark and warm and excited, and Yuzuru's heart skipped a beat when he thought about what was to come. 

"I missed you." he said lowly, kissing Javi's neck, hands moving up and down his sides "And I've been thinking about what I want to do with you."

"Yeah?" Javi asked, tilting his head to give Yuzuru better access "And what do you want?" 

Yuzuru stopped his ministrations for a moment, locking his gaze with Javi's again on the smooth surface of the mirror. 

"Everything." he said and Javi shuddered, his breathing hitching. 

"Yes." was all he said, quiet and breathless, one of his hands finding Yuzuru's "Yes, please." 

Yuzuru smiled, pleased and excited, kissing Javi's shoulder briefly before slowly dropping to his knees. He heard how Javi took a deep breath, as if he knew what was coming, and Yuzuru smiled even wider, his hands coming to knead Javi's ass. He leaned forward, nuzzling right above Javi's tailbone, closing his eyes and inhaling that familiar scent of soap and Javi himself. 

"So good." he murmured before slowly dragging his tongue down, and Javi keened quietly, pushing back a little, and Yuzuru pinched his hip. 

"Stay still." he ordered and Javi whined, but his body stilled. Yuzuru grinned to himself before properly spreading Javi's asscheeks and teasingly probing at his hole with his tongue before gently pushing the tip in. 

Yuzuru loved that, honestly. He loved feeling of Javi's muscles loosening up under and around his tongue, he loved the small whines Javi was making, and he loved the overwhelming feeling of intimacy that was coming with it. 

"Yuzu." Javi whined after what felt like hours, but Yuzuru still didn't have enough "Yuzu, I need more." 

Yuzuru chose to ignore that, putting his hand on the small of Javi's back and pressing lightly while working his tongue deeper, drawing a high pitched, muffled sound out of Javi. 

"Oh, oh." he moaned, his back arching a little, and Yuzuru finally pulled back, standing up and plastering himself against Javi's back and looking in a mirror. 

Javi's cheeks were flushed, pupils blown and lips parted; he looked gorgeous like that, and Yuzuru suddenly realized how hard he got just from eating Javi's ass. 

"You liked it, didn't you?" he asked huskily, reaching to a near cabinet when they had put a bottle of lube "You like it when I give you so much attention, huh?" 

"Ye- Ahh!" Javi moaned when Yuzuru pushed one slick finger inside him "Yes, yes-" 

"So greedy for my touch, aren't you?" Yuzuru asked, biting on Javi's earlobe "You're opening up for me so nicely… tell me how much you want it." he urged, adding a second finger and moving them in an unhurried pace, making sure that Javi was stretched nicely. 

"So much." Javi moaned "I want to feel you inside so badly, please-" 

"Hmm." Yuzuru hummed, considering. He looked at their reflection and he imagined how it would be, to bend Javi over the sink and fuck him, watching how his expression would shift in ecstasy. It was tempting, so tempting, and Yuzuru's cock hardened even more at that thought. But in the end, he had other plans for the night. 

He pressed a hot, open mouthed kiss to Javi's nape before taking a step back and pulling his fingers out, once again ignoring Javi's whine of protest. 

"Shhh." Yuzuru cooed, turning Javi around and then kissing his scrunched nose "Don't worry, I'll take good care of you." 

Javi's face smoothened at that, a tender, trusting smile blossoming on his lips, and Yuzuru once again realized how much Javi loved him, and his heart skipped a beat. 

He took Javi's hand and led him to the bedroom, gently making him sit on the edge of the bed while he took a step back, looking at Javi, taking his whole silhouette in. He was looking at him with so much hunger and want Yuzuru felt his arousal growing even stronger, and he swallowed hard before tugging his pants and underwear down and stepping out of them. 

He didn't even have to say anything, because a moment later Javi was on his lips, looking at Yuzuru teasingly from under those impossible lashes. 

"You know me so well, baby." Yuzuru murmured, tangling his fingers in Javi's hair and tugging gently "Now open those pretty lips of yours."

Javi didn't hesitate even for a second and Yuzuru felt warm tongue swirling around the head of his cock, and he groaned quietly, hand curling in Javi's hair. 

"Yeah, that's good." he breathed out and Javi hummed contentedly, taking him into his mouth and bobbing his head a little, smooth and practiced. 

The air was filled with their rapid breathing and wet, filthy sound of Javi's lips around Yuzuru’s cock, slick and hot. Yuzuru bit his lower lip, looking down at Javi and feeling a sharp thrill of pleasure at the sight in front of him. He looked at Javi's half- lidded eyes, strong neck and shoulders, and he moaned quietly, with pleasure, knowing that he had that man only to himself, for ever. 

"That's enough." he murmured, tugging at the curly hair on the back of Javi's head before taking a small step back, slipping out of Javi's mouth "Good boy." 

Javi whimpered quietly, eyes dark and wide, and Yuzuru patted his cheek gently, feeling waves of excitement and fondness crashing in his chest. 

"On the bed." he instructed and a few seconds later Javi was right there, on his hands and knees, sending Yuzuru a cheeky smile over his shoulder. 

"You know me so well." Yuzuru chuckled, going to the bed as well and kneeling behind Javi, caressing his back "Very good, now wait a mo-" 

"Yuzu." Javi said suddenly, looking over his shoulder again, his gaze deep and sure "I want to feel you." 

Yuzuru stopped mid-movement, his heart skipping a beat, because he knew what Javi meant. 

"Yeah?" he cleared his throat "Are you sure?" 

"Yes." Javi nodded and Yuzuru's initial plan shifted as he grabbed Javi's shoulder and turned him around, pushing him on the mattress and climbing on top of him. 

"I love you." he whispered "I love you, I love you, I love you."

Javi chuckled quietly, but then Yuzuru kissed him, fingers curling in Javi's hair and hips rolling a little. They kissed until they couldn’t breathe, and then they kissed even more, gasping quietly as they moved against each other. Yuzuru felt breathless and light- headed, and he never wanted to stop; he could spend the eternity like that, in Javi’s embrace, kissing him, feeling his heat and strong heartbeat against his own. But then Javi thrusted up a little, moaning softly, and Yuzuru shuddered at the jolt of pleasure running up his spine. 

“Okay.” he muttered into Javi’s mouth, biting on his bottom lip gently and then sitting back on his knees “Roll over for me.” 

Javi swallowed visibly before doing what he was told. Yuzuru grabbed one of the pillows and patted Javi’s hip, signalling him to move a little and then placing the pillow under Javi’s groin so it could bring him some relief later. 

“Oh, you’re playing nice today.” Javi chuckled, moving a little and getting into a comfortable position, and Yuzuru smiled devilishly.

“I can always change my mind, you know.” he said lowly, reaching for a bedside table where they had left a bottle of lube. Yuzuru moved to straddle Javi’s thighs and slowly lubing his cock, and Javi shifted beneath him, impatient. 

“Can’t wait, huh?” Yuzuru chuckled, placing a finger on the top of Javi’s spine and dragging it down, marvelling at the strength on his muscles and heat of his skin.

“I need you.” Javi whined and Yuzuru chuckled again, leaning to cover Javi’s entire body with his, kissing his neck, feeling his rapid pulse under his lips. 

“I’m going to make it so good.” he whispered, biting down gently and sliding one hand in between their bodies and taking his cock in his hand, positioning himself and pressing against Javi’s entrance. 

It was almost too much, the slick heat of Javi’s body, how he was taking Yuzuru in, gasping and whimpering; he was trying to move but he couldn’t, trapped under Yuzuru’s weight.

“Oh.” Javi whined and Yuzuru laughed breathlessly against his nape, raising on his elbows to get better leverage and pushing in a little bit harder, moaning softly at the feeling of being connected like that, without any layer between them. They didn’t do that often, not always in a mood for a mess, and it felt special, gratifying and precious. 

He slowly buried himself to the hilt, groaning and nipping at Javi's nape, while Javi was making pretty, loud choked out sounds, face buried in the pillow. 

"Feeling good?" 

"Mhh." 

Yuzuru smiled against Javi's skin and then moved slowly; he couldn’t do much in that position, so he just rolled his hips, barely pulling away, his cock still fully seated inside of Javi. It was just teasing, a prelude to what was coming next, but Javi was breathing hard already, his fingers curling on the sheet. Yuzuru could sense how starved Javi was, how much he wanted Yuzuru, how much he needed him. 

"You can't wait, huh?" Yuzuru asked lowly, grinding against Javi's ass "Really want to get fucked, hmmm?" 

The only answer he got was a needy moan, and Yuzuru once again marvelled at that situation. 

Long time ago, before him and Javi got together, he has never really hoped he could have Javi that way, whimpering and at Yuzuru's mercy. But one short trip changed everything, and Yuzuru discovered that Javi wasn't such an open book as he was thinking. Because Javi, so strong and independent during the day, was dropping that facade the moment the bedroom door closed behind him. He was kind and gentle as always, but also vulnerable and craving for someone to take care of him. And Yuzuru, always wanting to stay in control, was more than happy to give it all to him. 

It was kind of unbelievable, still, how they had found their way to each other, how they fell in love, and how they were giving each other everything. Yuzuru shuddered slightly, his chest going a bit tight with emotions, and then he slowly sat up, straddling Javi's thighs. 

He chewed on his bottom lip, reaching to caress Javi's back and smiling to himself when he felt how his muscles worked with every shaky breath. 

"You look so pretty like that." he said and noticed with satisfaction that Javi's breathing hitched "But I'm hoping to hear some pretty sounds coming out of your mouth too." 

With that, he moved back, slipping out of Javi and grabbing Javi's hips, pushing them up so now his ass on full display. 

"You said I was playing nice today." he said smoothly, positioning himself behind Javi and rubbing against him teasingly "Well I changed my mind a bit. You know what that means, right?" 

"Yuzu-" Javi choked out, and then yelped when Yuzuru smacked his ass. 

"What does it mean?" 

"I can't come until you tell me so." Javi whispered hoarsely and Yuzuru hummed with approval, caressing the spot he had hit before. 

"Very good." he murmured before pushing in with one smooth thrust. Javi cried out brokenly, fists clenching, and Yuzuru gasped, closing his eyes for a second before setting a slow, steady rhythm. 

"Oh fuck." Javi whined quietly, pushing back carefully to meet Yuzuru's unhurried thrusts "Oh, oh-" 

"Does it feel good?" Yuzuru asked, pressing one hand to the back of Javi's neck, feeling his hot, sweaty skin "Come on, tell me." 

"So good." Javi moaned "It's been too long, I, ah-" 

"You missed this, huh?" Yuzuru asked, gripping Javi's hips again "You missed being fucked slow and good-" 

"Yes." Javi agreed eagerly, his voice catching in his throat "Yes, Yuzu, please-" 

"Please what?" 

"More." Javi pleaded, voice trembling, and Yuzuru hummed, slowing down deliberately. 

"Hmm, let's see." he reached to wrap his fingers around Javi's cock, and Javi's hips jerked into Yuzuru's hand, a high moan escaping his lips. 

"Look at you, so wound up already." Yuzuru mused, stroking Javi's slick cock slowly "You're really needing this, hmm?" 

"Yuzu, please." Javi basically sobbed, and then keened when Yuzuru pressed his thumb against the tip of his cock "Ah, please, I-" 

"Very well." Yuzuru murmured "But remember what I told you."

With that, Yuzuru pulled back so only a tip was still inside, and then he snapped his hips forward in a sharp move. He set up quick, punishing pace, every stroke tearing a loud cry from Javi's lips, and Yuzuru felt delirious, drunk with control and drunk with pleasure Javi's body was giving him, slick and hot and so tight. 

"That's good." Yuzuru groaned, pulling at Javi's hips roughly to fuck him even harder "Fuck, your body, and only mine-" 

Javi cried out loudly, his body tensing for a second before he trembled violently, his muscles clenching around Yuzuru as he came on his boyfriend's cock. 

Yuzuru chuckled lowly, thrusting shallowly a few times before pulling away completely and Javi immediately slumped on his front, breathing raggedly. Yuzuru gave him a moment to calm down before cleaning his throat pointedly. 

"Turn around." he ordered and Javi turned on his back dutifully, groaning quietly. Yuzuru moved to straddle his thighs, looking down at him and clicking his tongue. 

"Don't you have anything to tell me?" 

Javi's cheeks were flushed, eyes still clouded by pleasure, but he bit his lower lip nervously before looking Yuzuru in the eyes. 

"I'm sorry." he muttered "I- I couldn't help it." 

Yuzuru smirked, pressing his hand to Javi's stomach, feeling how his muscles still trembled in aftershocks. 

"Hmmm, and what should I do with you?" he asked, rolling his hips and gasping a little. It was good and he knew that he could come like that, fucking Javi's legs, but he had plans for some different kind of fun. 

"I-" Javi licked his lips, his eyelids fluttering, but Yuzuru silenced him, gently pressing his hand against Javi's throat. 

"Don't talk." he said softly before slowly crawling down Javi's body and spreading his legs "You need to save your throat for later." he whispered before taking Javi's soft cock in his mouth, sucking gently at the tip. 

Javi let out a pained gasp, his legs straining, and he pushed at the top of Yuzuru's head, making short, desperate noises. Yuzuru pulled away, feeling Javi's tangy, taste on his tongue, and he smiled. 

"Too much?" he asked gently and Javi whimpered quietly, his eyes glistening. 

"Kiss me." he pleaded, small and vulnerable, and Yuzuru gasped, all air leaving his lungs. 

He moved quickly and a second later he was claiming Javi's lips with his, sloppy and desperate, and Yuzuru thought dizzily that it was even better than sex itself, to kiss Javi, taste his mouth and swallow his moans. 

They kissed until they couldn't breathe, and then they kissed again, Yuzuru almost forgot how hard he was until he felt Javi's growing erection against his hip, and he shuddered with want. 

"Javi." he moaned into his lover's mouth "Can I-?" 

"Yes." Javi whispered, carding his fingers through Yuzuru's hair and throwing his head back when Yuzuru started kissing his neck "Take me, Yuzu, I need you-" 

That time they kept it slow, unhurried, keeping eye contact all the time, and Yuzuru almost couldn't breathe. Javi was smiling, relaxed, gasping quietly every time Yuzuru brushed against his prostate. 

Now, that a part of that nagging fire was gone, they could focus on slowly reaching pleasure together, and Yuzuru knew he would always treasure moments like that, with Javi repeating his name quietly, Javi's body welcoming him with warm ease. 

It was so much, intimacy, love, and suddenly Yuzuru was hovering over the edge, and he gasped for air, feeling breathless already. 

"Touch yourself." he said breathlessly and Javi tilted his head a little, eyes half- lidded and dark. 

"I need you to come first. Please." he asked quietly and Yuzuru moaned, back arching and hips stuttering. 

"I love you so much." he whimpered "I-" 

His orgasm came to him in waves, overwhelming and endless, and he was vaguely aware of Javi crying out his name before Yuzuru collapsed on top of him, trembling and boneless. 

It felt like the whole eternity until he was able to breathe properly again, and he propped himself on his elbows to look at Javi's face, checking if everything was alright.

Javi was looking at him, his eyes half open and smiling, his expression blissed out and happy. All Yuzuru wanted to do was to stay like that, still buried inside Javi’s warmth, but he forced his body to move and he rolled off Javi, wincing at the loss of contact. 

For a moment they didn’t say anything, just stared at probably the same spot on the ceiling, their breathing finally slowing down. 

“Well fuck.” Javi said weakly and Yuzuru snorted, turning on his side and burying his nose in Javi’s curls.

“We just did.”

“This is the lamest fucking line in the history.” Javi chuckled and Yuzuru laughed.

“You love it.”

“I do.” Javi said softly and Yuzuru’s heart clenched with affections. 

“Good.” he murmured, kissing Javi’s temple “Do you need something? I will help you clean up-”

“No.” Javi said, turning so they were facing each other, his expression soft and sleepy “Just… hold me. Just hold me, please.”

And Yuzuru did just that.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Smut & Feels

Yuzuru hummed to the song playing in the radio quietly, cutting a tomato into nice slices and then placing them on sandwiches. Then he chopped some green onions and sprinkled them on the top, smiling with approval. He grabbed an orange and peeled it quickly, breaking it into pieces and putting them into a small bowl. Coffee seemed ready too, the only thing he had to do was to wake Javi up.

Javi was sleeping soundly, lying on his stomach, breathing steadily into the pillow. His hair was a mess, and he was barely covered by a sheet wrapped loosely around his waist. He looked so calm and relaxed that Yuzuru almost considered letting him sleep more, but then he realized that sleeping for so long would make Javi even more whiny after waking up.

"Hey." he tickled Javi's foot "Wakey, wakey, I made you breakfast."

Predictably, Javi whined loudly and curled into a ball, reaching for the sheet blindly and covering himself to the chin, grumbling something grumpily.

Yuzuru chuckled and climbed on the bed, leaning to kiss Javi's temple.

"Come on, it's a really nice breakfast, to help you gain some energy. You promised we would go for a walk, remember?"

"Mhh." Javi agreed, but beside that didn't move.

"Well you asked for it." Yuzuru announced before sticking his tongue inside Javi's ear, making him screech loudly.

"Nooo!" he squealed, trying to move away "Okay, okay, I'm getting up-!"

"You see, it wasn't that difficult." Yuzuru chuckled, moving away and watching Javi sitting up slowly and making a small ritual of yawning and stretching.

"You slept well? Feeling okay?" Yuzuru asked and Javi smiled, sleepy but sunny.

"I'm great." he said, winking "Okay, I will just grab a quick shower before eating, I'm kind of… sticky." he said with a smug grin and Yuzuru made a face at him.

"Go, go, the coffee won't get cold that quickly. You shower, I'll change sheets.

Javi grinned widely before standing up and heading to the bathroom, and Yuzuru smiled to himself, getting to work quickly. The sheets were rumpled, with clear evidence of the heated night, and Yuzuru bit his lower lip, feeling some warm, giddy feeling forming inside his belly.

The last night had been a bit frantic, both drunk with knowledge that they were finally together, finally alone. Yuzuru shuddered a little at the memory of that blinding pleasure, and at the realization that there was still five days ahead of them, and Yuzuru couldn't wait the spend them only with Javi. They deserved that, after so many weeks apart, making their relationship work for another year despite the distance.

When he was done with the sheets, Yuzuru walked to the kitchen and poured himself a glass of orange juice, and a moment later Javi walked in as well, all bright and smiling, with wet hair and a towel wrapped loosely around his waist.

"Good morning." he said, making his way to the counter and reaching for the coffee pot "Ah, I see the drink of gods-!"

"I want a kiss first." Yuzuru pouted "One that won't taste like coffee."

Javi laughed at that shortly but leaned in immediately, kissing Yuzuru chastely.

"Good morning." he whispered and Yuzuru hummed contentedly, deepening the kiss a little. He put his hands on Javi's hips, pulling him closer, and Javi flinched a little, a quiet hiss leaving his lips.

"Everything okay?" Yuzuru asked, pulling back immediately, worried, and Javi smiled, reassuring.

"I'm perfectly fine. Just a little-" he shrugged, his cheeks turning a lightest shade of pink, and Yuzuru got it.

He carefully unwrapped the towel Javi was covered with, and he winced at the dark bruises staining Javi's hips, Yuzuru's fingertips imprinted on his skin.

"I'm sorry."

It wasn't the first time, but Yuzuru always felt guilty, and Javi always told him that it was okay.

I'm happy that you want me so much, still Javi said usually, kissing Yuzuru lovingly and then changing the topic. And he did that now too, launching into an eager description of a small trip they were going to have. And like every time, the feeling of guilt disappeared, and in its place was only fondness and gratitude.

They were dating for two years now, and Yuzuru was pretty sure they were going to be forever. No one had ever made him feel the way Javi did, and he never loved anyone as much as he loved Javi. They were a team, and Yuzuru knew that together they could battle through anything. They had found their way to each other, and there was no option to let each other go.

"What have I done to deserve such a good breakfast?" Javi chuckled and Yuzuru smiled at him, going back to reality.

"Oh, you know." Yuzuru smirked and Javi made a face at him before laughing shortly.

"I knew you only love me for my body!" he exclaimed dramatically "But it's okay, I enjoy it." he added with a wink before standing up "Okay, thank you so much, it was great." he said, leaning over the table to kiss Yuzuru briefly "Now, ready for some walking?"

Some walking turned to be a literal hike, and Yuzuru was mildly excited about that. He wasn't in bad shape or anything, but when Javi started leading him through some narrow path up some hill, Yuzuru wasn't too ecstatic. Javi, on the other hand, was in a great mood, humming and telling Yuzuru stories about some holidays he had previously spent in that place. Luckily, there was a lot of shade, so they weren't dying from heat, and after some time Yuzuru started enjoying it a bit more. It was always nice, to hang out with Javi, to talk to him, to hear his laughter. Days like that were making all the effort worth it, and Yuzuru knew that he would be recalling every minute during long, lonely nights.

They were walking maybe for an hour when Javi suddenly stepped off the path and started walking through the bushes, clearly looking for a way between the trees and Yuzuru scrunched his nose, following Javi hesitantly.

"Uhh, Javi? Where are we going?"

"You'll see! Don't worry, it's just a moment!"

He was right; maybe five minutes later the forest ended, and they were standing on the edge of a small glade with a beautiful view on the near hills and village down in the valley.

"Wow." Yuzuru breathed out, gaping, and Javi smiled widely.

"Nice, isn't it? Me and Jorge used to come here to drink some sangria we stole from his auntie."

"Why am I not surprised." Yuzuru snorted, shaking his head "The view is amazing."

"Right? And not so many people come here, probably they don't even know it's here."

"Well, their loss."

"Exactly." Javi smiled "But that's not everything, come on." he ordered, moving forward down the slope, and after a few seconds Yuzuru heard a quiet murmur of water.

"Ta- dam!" Javi announced as they stopped near to two pine trees and Yuzuru saw a small spring, water running down the slope with happy babbling.

It was a perfect spot, and they spread their blanket on the ground and they lay down in the shadow, Yuzuru resting his head on Javi's chest and humming happily.

"So, was the hike worth it?"

"Mhh." Yuzuru muttered and Javi chuckled, his fingers tangling in Yuzuru's hair and gently massaging his head. It was quiet and peaceful, and Yuzuru inhaled deeply, his nose filled with scent of pines and Javi's body. It was perfect, and they didn't even have to speak too much, just enjoying each other, listening to their heartbeats and chirping of birds.

"We should go for vacation more often." Javi said, tugging at Yuzuru's hair gently "If you get a grasp on your next season's schedule, we could plan something in advance, go to... New Zealand, maybe, or somewhere."

"Sounds good." Yuzuru chuckled, his heartbeat quickening for a moment as he realized that he had to speak about something he had thought about a lot lately, and it was time for Javi to hear it.

Slowly, he sat up, and Javi scrunched his nose, clearly wondering. He made a move to sit up as well, but Yuzuru pressed his hand over Javi's heart, preventing him from doing that.

"Javi." he said slowly, biting his lip "I've been thinking-" he stopped, suddenly unsure how to voice his thoughts, and Javi smiled at him encouragingly.

"Yeah?"

"I want to retire."

The words left his lips on their own, and Javi blinked rapidly, his face a picture of innocent shock.

"Wha- oh." he gasped, sitting up despite Yuzuru's hand holding him down "Oh, Yuzu-"

"Yeah." Yuzuru laughed, nervous for some reason "I know."

"I- why didn't you tell me?" Javi asked, still clearly surprised, and Yuzuru shrugged, looking down for a moment and taking Javi's hand, linking their fingers together.

"I just... I felt like I had to think about it on my own, first. It took me some time."

Javi hummed with understanding, but his expression was a bit puzzled.

"After worlds?" he asked and Yuzuru took a deep breath and shook his head.

"Grand prix. Skate Canada, or the final if I get there."

"I'm- what? Why?"

"It's just worlds." Yuzuru shrugged and Javi snorted, despite all the shocks.

"Just worlds? Who are you and what have you done with my Yuzu?"

"I've been thinking, and I have to be reasonable. The chances that I can win aren't exactly extremely high-"

"Woah, hold on-"

"No, Javi, listen." Yuzuru said, pressing his fingers to Javi's lips and smiling softly "I've done my research, and a lot of thinking. I'm not the youngest anymore, and my body feels it. I don't want to go there for a maybe. Besides that, that means less months spent away from you."

"Oh." Javi gasped softly, bringing his hand to caress Yuzuru's cheek "I- I don't even know what to say?"

"You don't have to say anything." Yuzuru smiled, taking Javi's hand and dropping a kiss there "Just ask Jorge if we can come here again, when it will be all over and I'll tell the world about you and me."

Javi inhaled deeply, and then sighed, his expression melting into pure love and fondness.

"Consider it done." he said softly "I- I'm really proud of you."

"I'm kind of proud of myself too." Yuzuru chuckled, and then sighed, smiling sheepishly "Can we, maybe, talk about the details later? I don't want to bring these angsty feelings now."

"Hmm, fine." Javi agreed "But you know the first rule of this relationship, right. We ta-"

"We talk, yes." Yuzuru agreed, putting his hands on Javi's shoulders and smiling playfully "But we can do it a bit later."

Javi opened his mouth as if to say something, but Yuzuru silenced him with a kiss, gently pushing Javi to lay down again. After a few seconds Javi relaxed completely, sighing and kissing Yuzuru back, arms wrapped around Yuzuru securely.

It felt special, being like that, careless and warm, kissing lazy and open- mouthed, and it only takes a few minutes for Yuzuru to feel a familiar ache coiling in the pit of his stomach. He moaned softly, rolling his hips a little, and Javi hissed, his hand coming to Yuzuru's ass and pulling him closer.

Yuzuru pulled back with a gasp, and then pecked Javi on the lips three time, tasting his smile again before moving to kiss down his neck. Javi sighed contentedly, throwing his head back, and Yuzuru smiled against his skin.

"Have I ever told you-" he murmured, biting gently at Javi's collarbone "- that you're the best thing I ever tasted?"

"Stooop." Javi giggled "You're making me blush."

"You deserve all the compliments." Yuzuru stated before sitting up and smiling at Javi, and then shifting back a little, hooking his fingers on the waistband of Javi's shorts.

"Lift your hips for me?"

"Oh boy." Javi chuckled, doing what Yuzuru asked "Should I be scared?"

"With me, never."

Yuzuru started with placing careful, gentle kisses over those little bruises on Javi's hips, and Javi hummed quietly, reaching to brush Yuzuru's bangs away.

"Hey." he said softly and Yuzuru looked up, resting his chin on Javi's stomach.

"Hmm?"

"I love you."

Yuzuru would never get tired of hearing those words, and of seeing that special smile blossoming on Javi's lips.

And he would never grow tired of saying in back. 

“I love you too.” he whispered before nuzzling against Javi’s belly button, making him giggle. Then Yuzuru moved his lips lower, tip of his tongue pressing against the base of Javi’s cock, and the giggle turned into a soft moan. And as Yuzuru took him inside his mouth, he once again marvelled at how damn lucky he was. Lucky that Javi loved him back, and that he was understanding Yuzuru’s nature, his need for control, his nature. Sometimes Yuzuru still couldn’t quite believe, how easily Javi had put himself in his hands, giving him his heart and body.

“Oh.” Javi breathed out, his fists curling on the blanket “Oh, that’s, Mhh-”

Yuzuru loved how vocal Javi was, he loved all the raspy groans and soft whimpers, encouraging words getting caught in his throat. Yuzuru started bobbing his head, taking him deeper, and Javi tensed, his back arching and hips jerking up. Yuzuru pulled back at that, smiling, and then blew at the tip of Javi’s cock, tearing another whimper out of Javi’s lips.

“Shhh.” Yuzuru cooed, kissing Javi’s erection from the tip to the base “I’ve got you, don’t worry.”

With that, he took Javi again, sucking eagerly while his hand came to fondle with Javi’s balls. 

Javi let out a stream of incoherent noises, giving up any restraint and pushing inside Yuzuru’s mouth, desperate for his release. It only took a few more moments before he let out a loud groan, his thighs trembling, and he came down Yuzuru’s throat, hot and pulsing.

Yuzuru kept on sucking gently until Javi whined brokenly, rolling his hips, and Yuzuru got the message. He sat upright and looked down at Javi, and his heart skipped a beat at the sight. Javi looked so good like that, flushed, eyes half closed and chest heaving, his expression blissed out, and Yuzuru hummed contentedly, happy with the result of his ministrations. 

“Everything good in here?” he asked, his fingers drawing circles on Javi’s stomach.

“Mhh.” Javi mumbled, opening his eyes and giving him lazy, happy smile “Give me a minute and I will-”

“There’s no need.” Yuzuru shook his head, tugging his pants down a little and taking his hard cock out, sighing as he wrapped his fingers around it “You know that sucking you off turns me on so much I don’t need a lot-”

“You’re so dirty.” Javi giggled and Yuzuru smiled, and then groaned when he quickened the pace of his moves. 

"And you're too hot." he moaned, feeling his climax approaching "Oh fuck-" 

He pushed into his hand two, three times, and then he was coming, groaning quietly as his body shook, eyes rolling back, and he needed a few seconds to catch a breath again. He was vaguely aware of Javi making quiet, soothing noises, and Yuzuru opened his eyes with difficulty, seeing Javi’s warm, fond smile. He chuckled weakly, wiping his hand on the grass before leaning down to kiss Javi, slow and lazy. 

“Hmm.” he sighed against Javi’s lips happily, leaving one more kiss in the corner of his mouth before resting his head on Javi’s shoulder. For a moment they just lay like that, basking in the afterglow, but then Yuzuru sighed, nuzzling against Javi’s neck and propping himself on his elbow to look down at his boyfriend.

“I think we should get dressed, in case someone decides to wander in her, in the end.” he said and Javi rolled his eyes.

“Twenty minutes ago, you weren’t complaining.” he pointed out, but dutifully pulled his underwear and shorts up “But we can stay a little longer, right?” 

Yuzuru just smiled at got back to his previous position, and Javi turned his head to look at him, all soft and smiling, but with a hint of something serious around his eyes. 

“Yuzu.” he started quietly “You know, if you change your mind-”

“I won’t.” Yuzuru shook his head a little “You are my future, Javi. Not competing, not anymore. Okay?”

Javi stared at him for a long moment, and swallowed visibly, his smile turning even more gentle.

“Okay.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi this is just smut and feels and I hope I didn't fail miserably. You know the drill, top Yuzu and all that jazz, I hope you enjoy 🙈

Javi sighed softly, opening his mouth and sinking deeper into the mattress as Yuzuru shifted on top of him, hand cupping Javi’s jaw to keep him still and deepen the kiss. They were both naked, clothes scattered in a path leading to the bathroom, where they had fumbled from some time before, kissing and laughing before falling on the bed.

Javi moaned quietly, feeling Yuzuru's hand traveling to his hip, thumb stroking the sensitive skin, and Javi shuddered, feeling anticipation coiling in his veins, filling his body with warmth. He felt so safe, trapped between the mattress and Yuzuru's familiar weight, pressing him down but not suffocating, a steady reminder of who they were.

Yuzuru hummed, whispering something in quiet Japanese before drawing back a little, sitting upright and looking down at Javi with eyes filled with love and joy.

"So-" he said teasingly, caressing Javi cheek gently before moving his hand down to trace his neck "What am I going to do with you?"

"Anything you want." Javi gasped, reaching to catch Yuzuru's hand "Make me feel good?"

"Always."

Yuzuru squeezed Javi's fingers before slipping off of his lap and patting his hip pointedly. Javi grinned at him playfully, raising his eyebrows and pretending not to understand, and Yuzuru's eyes darkened. He reached to Javi's hair, tugging harshly but not enough to hurt, and he leaned to whisper right into Javi's ear.

"You know what happens when you don't listen to me."

Javi shuddered, his throat going a bit dry, and Yuzuru chuckled lowly, his teeth grazing Javi’s earlobe before he pulled back again, his smile turning sly.

“Now, turn around.” he said lowly and Javi did that, feeling anticipation stirring in his stomach, first tingling sparks of arousal coiling in his stomach.

“There we go.” Yuzuru muttered, clearly pleased, before pressing himself to Javi’s back, mouthing on the side of his neck.

Javi sighed contentedly, closing his eyes and nuzzling against the pillow. He was feeling so incredibly warm, soft and almost sleepy, but at the same time he knew what was coming, and he appreciated the slowness of it all, how Yuzuru wasn’t rushing, letting everything build steadily.

“Good?” Yuzuru asked, a hint of amusement in his voice, and Javi hummed happily, feeling how Yuzuru shifted a little, pressing his lips to the back of Javi’s neck before slowly kissing his way down his spine, hands roaming on Javi’s sides, causing goosebumps to raise on his skin.

“You better don’t get all sleepy on me.” Yuzuru chuckled, nuzzling against the small of Javi’s back “I have big plans.”

“I bet you do- oh.” Javi yelped, eyes flying open as he felt Yuzuru’s tongue dipping lower, finding that spot where Javi was already warm and loose after their earlier activities in the shower. And he had been expecting things to go like that, but it always made him gasp, the feeling of Yuzuru’s hot mouth, tongue moving in teasingly, and Javi moaned quietly, fingers curling on the sheets.

“Oh, ah.” Javi mumbled, pushing back a little, trying to get a bit more, a bit closer, but that made Yuzuru pull back, his laughter warm against Javi’s skin.

“You love that, don’t you?” he teased, running his hands up and down Javi’s thighs “You love to feel my tongue inside, opening you up-”

“Yu-”

Javi gave up talking, focusing on breathing. He tried to move a little, get some friction, but Yuzuru was holding him firmly, his tongue working lazily on getting Javi more excited with every second.

Before getting with Yuzuru, Javi had never thought he would enjoy something like that, but there he was, melting against Yuzuru’s touch and craving for more, more, and more.

“Okay.” Yuzuru murmured, pulling out, and Javi whined quietly, feeling too good and relaxed, and Yuzuru clicked his tongue with some amused disapproval “Come on, on your back, or I will get impatient.”

Javi complied, and Yuzuru was back on him in a second, sucking on his neck, fingers digging in Javi’s waist.

“You know what happens when you try to test me.” he murmured lowly, biting on Javi’s pulse point gently, making his blood buzz “I will make you feel so good now.” he whispered hoarsely into Javi’s ear “So good you will remember it during all the months apart.” he kissed skin under Javi’s ear before slowly kissing down his neck.

Javi closed his eyes, gasping quietly as Yuzuru kept on kissing down his body, his chest, stomach, until his nose nudged Javi’s cock, and his whole body tensed, a quiet moan escaping his lips.

“All that teasing really go you, hmm?” Yuzuru asked, cocking his eyebrow as his fingers wrapped around Javi’s shaft, stroking him lazily, and Javi cursed under his breath, feeling so good but knowing Yuzuru wasn't going to give it to him easily. And he was right, because after a few more strokes Yuzuru grinned and flopped on his back next to Javi, raising his eyebrow.

"If you want it, you need to take it." he said and Javi gasped and rolled on top of Yuzuru, careful not to crush him before kissing him deeply, sighing happily into a kiss and letting Yuzuru know how much he was enjoying all what was happening. Yuzuru let out a muffled chuckle, putting his hand on Javi's nape to keep him at place and kiss him back, slow and wet, his tongue working against Javi's and making him moan quietly.

"That's enough." Yuzuru rasped, pulling at Javi's hair and making him draw back "Now sit on my cock and make us both feel good, huh?"

Before getting together, Javi had never suspected Yuzuru's mouth could form such dirty words, but then again, there was so many things they learned about each other since that fateful weekend trip to the hot springs.

Javi felt a little bit rebellious, so he kissed Yuzuru once more, a little peck that earned him another harsh tug on his hair and a pointed glance.

"Don't try me, because you know how it might end." Yuzuru warned him and Javi bit his lip before moving to straddle Yuzuru's hips, not wanting to give his lover reasons to come with some wicked plan, at least not for now.

There was a moment of rush when they couldn't remember where they had put the lube, but then, finally, Javi positioned himself over Yuzuru's cock, taking a shuddering breath before slowly going down, Yuzuru's hands holding his hips firmly.

It went pretty smooth, due to their previous activities and a generous amount of lubricant, but Javi still shuddered violently when he bottomed out, his muscles spasming and breathing coming out in ragged gasps. He closed his eyes, trying to get used to the feeling of fullness and Yuzuru cooed quietly, rubbing his sides soothingly.

"Have a moment, we have all the time."

Javi wasn't too fond of that position, but not because it was unpleasant. Hell no, being on top was making his body feel like on fire, in the best of ways. But there was something about it, an aspect that was always making Javi feel a little bit uncertain, at least in the beginning. Being like that, with Yuzuru holding him close and looking up at him with dark eyes full of desire, Javi felt exposed, safe but weirdly vulnerable. Yuzuru knew it, of course he did, he knew everything about Javi's needs and uncertainties, but sometimes he would still suggest to do it that way, as if trying to get Javi to overcome that little barrier inside his head.

"Hey."

Javi opened his eyes, not remembering when he had closed them, and saw Yuzuru's face, smiling at him tenderly as he reached to touch Javi's cheek.

"It's okay." he reassured him gently "You look so good like that, you know? I want you to embrace it, to feel it... fuck, I love seeing you like that. Come on-"

Javi swallowed hard, leaning into Yuzuru's touch before rolling his hips a little, gasping when Yuzuru's cock nudged that spot inside of him that was making him gasp, filling his belly with hot sparks of arousal and pleasure.

"Yeah, like that." Yuzuru's voice was rougher now, and so were his hands, fingers digging in Javi's flesh "Make yourself feel good for me."

Javi whimpered and Yuzuru grinned, squeezing Javi's hips, urging him to move while he stayed still, a playful glint in his eyes, and Javi knew that he wasn’t going to do anything, he was going to watch Javi move on top of him until he would come undone, no matter how long it would take.

Javi knew that there was no cruelty in that, only love, endless and caring, so he took one more deep breath before leaning forward slowly, bracing his hands on the both sides of Yuzuru’s head, gasping when he felt Yuzuru’s length slipping out of his body a little. 

He set a slow, careful rhythm, getting used to that special feeling of fullness that position was giving him. It was the most of power Yuzuru was ever giving to him while they were having sex, but Javi never felt fully in control, and it was something he was used to, something he liked, something he craved, even. 

With his previous partners, he had been expected to take a role, to be in the lead, to take care about the other person. He accepted that, and it was good, but deep inside he always longed for the things to be different. He longed for someone who would press him against the mattress and do whatever the hell he pleased, someone to take control, tell him what to do. For the most of his life he had to make decisions and choices on his own, but then Yuzuru appeared, with that special glint in his eyes, with hands both rough and gentle, and they fit into each other perfectly. 

“Oh, oh.” he whimpered quietly, his eyelids fluttering, but Yuzuru patted his cheek, making him open his eyes again. 

“You gotta look at me, Javi. I need to see you.”

Yuzuru’s voice was low and husky and Javi shuddered, grinding down a bit harder, whimpering again when he felt his muscles tensing, and he was getting closer, he really was, but he knew he needed something more, and he didn’t dare to ask, he wasn’t sure if he was able to form words anyway. He only knew that Yuzuru felt perfect inside him, so good and still not enough, and there were tears gathering in the corners if his eyes, nagging, burning. 

“Yuzu.” he managed to choke out, quiet, pleading, and he wasn’t even sure what he was asking for, exactly, and he didn’t think it would do anything anyway, but Yuzuru’s expression softened as he brought his thumb to caress Javi’s lower lip.

“You’ve been doing so good.” he purred. sliding his hand to Javi’s nape and then down his spine, lower and lower “Come on, love, come for me.” he urged, his fingers rubbing Javi’s stretched, sensitive rim, and Javi sobbed, leaning forward even more, the tip of his cock brushing against Yuzuru's flat stomach. Every muscle in his body tensed and then he finally fell across the edge, sparks of white pleasure exploding inside of him and black dots dancing in his eyes. He slumped forward, boneless and winded, and he was only vaguely aware of Yuzuru’s hands rubbing his back and his pulse pounding somewhere close to Javi’s ear. 

“There you go.” Yuzuru chuckled, hot breath fanning over Javi’s temple “So good.”

Javi was still barely coherent when Yuzuru slowly rolled them over, sitting back and slipping out of Javi’s body completely, making him shudder and whimper. 

“Shh, shh.” Yuzuru cooed, bringing his hand to caress Javi’s abdomen, where his muscles were still twitching in aftershocks “It’s all good now.” he whispered, covering Javi’s body with his, pressing their lips together. 

Javi tried to kiss him back, but his reactions were a bit delayed, and Yuzuru chuckled, moving to kiss his jaw.

“Do you-” Javi mumbled, slowly collecting himself and realizing that Yuzuru was still hard, pressing against Javi’s hip.

“It’s okay. We have a lot of time.” he whispered before capturing Javi's lips again. 

They kept on kissing for what felt like ages, bodies sliding against each other, slick and hot, fingers tangled on now rumpled sheets, lips parting, greedy and panting. 

Javi didn't really think, lost in the warm haze of pleasure, where suddenly he felt Yuzuru's fingers trailing down his chest and stomach, touching his half erected cock. 

"Oh." Javi yelped and Yuzuru grinned, nipping on his bottom lip before pulling back, sitting straight up and sliding off of Javi's lap, making him groan in protest. 

"Don't worry, I'm not going far." Yuzuru chuckled, reaching to the bedside table and then coming back with a purple object in his hand. 

"You did a great job in the shower, but I think I could use that pretty mouth of yours once more." he said, smiling smugly and getting on his hands and knees, throwing Javi a pointed glance over his shoulder "Don't keep me waiting." he added lowly and Javi didn't have to be told twice. He got to work enthusiastically, Yuzuru's quiet gasps of pleasure and warmth of his body making his spine tingle, so he was kind of disappointed when after a few short minutes Yuzuru reached to pat the top of his head. 

"Enough." 

Javi pouted a little and Yuzuru laughed, moving closer and taking Javi's hands in his hands, kissing him sweetly. 

"You're so wonderful." he mumbled, drawing back a little before grabbing the purple object again and bringing it to Javi's face. Javi grinned, surging forward and taking it in his mouth, and Yuzuru gasped, lips falling open and eyes darkening. His free hand traveled down, wrapping around Javi's cock and stroking slowly, drawing a muffled moan out of him. 

By the time Yuzuru moved back and pushed Javi on the mattress, Javi was breathing hard and his head was swimming, and it was as is his body was wounded in anticipation again, despite slight tiredness of his muscles. He watched how Yuzuru took a deep breath before bending a little and carefully putting the butt plug inside his ass, a slight grimace running through his face before he looked at Javi with a pleased expression. He moved closer and grabbed one of the pillows, sliding it under Javi's hips for the better angle before nestling between his legs, and suddenly his face was right above Javi's, and for a moment, everything stopped, and Javi gasped softly, eyes almost closing. 

"Are you okay?" Yuzuru asked, a hint of concern in his eyes, and Javi smiled, reaching to smooth the worried lines on his forehead. 

"I love you. So much."

Yuzuru blinked, and then his expression melting in a soft, fond smile. 

"And I love you. The best thing that ever happened to me." he whispered, placing a soft, tender kiss on Javi's lips. 

When he slid inside of Javi again, it felt almost too much, not before how sensitive Javi felt, but because of all the emotions crashing inside his chest, hot and suffocating. 

How did they get there, after so long? Javi had never expected that the love of his life would be a man, more, someone he knew for so many years until a spark appeared, setting their hearts on fire and then they were, linked together in every way possible. Now Yuzuru was panting against his neck, moving in a slow, steady rhythm, and Javi's only thought was the he loved him, with his whole heart and body, endlessly, like no one before. 

They weren't going fast, but it only made everything better, it wasn't too much, the drag of Yuzuru's cock inside of him just on the edge of pleasure and slight discomfort, making his stomach clench. 

"I'm close." Yuzuru groaned, raising in his elbows, nose scrunched, hair damp from sweat, and Javi smiled, reaching to squeeze Yuzuru's ass and then moving his hand lower, fingers finding the now warm edge of the plug and pulling it out slowly. 

Yuzuru moaned, loud and piercing, his thrusting harshly before stilling and coming silently, not one sound leaving his open mouth, his back arched and eyes tightly shut in a moment of pure bliss. 

"Fuck." he whispered hoarsely, muscles trembling, and Javi smiled, feeling sleepy and drunk, and not really caring that he hadn't come again. But Yuzuru cared, bringing his hand down, and after a few tight strokes Javi's hips bucked up and his body was flooded with warm, gentle wave. 

He was vaguely aware of Yuzuru wiping them both hastily and then pressing himself to Javi's side, wrapping his arms around him. 

"We should shower again." he whispered, kissing Javi's temple before nuzzling against his neck. 

"Mhh, soon." 

"Okay." Yuzuru whispered, sounding like he was falling asleep "Soon."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (I wanted to reread it to check once more but I got too embarrassed halfway through so I'm posting i hope you enjoyed 😂)

**Author's Note:**

> Like it? Hate it? Don't hesitate to tell me in the comments and thank you so much for reading!


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